Learn what it is like to have people on your side. Thousands of readers and commentators on this site come here believing that the abuse they have experienced is unique to them. That they are alone in their experience.
The shock is to find themselves NOT ALONE. Shocked to find that others live, or have lived, their same, or similar story.
In my daily counselling practice on this SpeakOutLoud website, on Skype or Apple Facetime, I see the progress victims make when the penny drops as they begin to understand how coercive control and psychological abuse has been used to strip away their dignity and person.
I see their dismay, anguish, despair, self-doubt and low self-esteem turn to anger, resentment, and even rage as they see their wasted life believing the perpetrator’s bullying tactics, the blame and the subterfuge that has almost convinced them they were unworthy, even insane.
Often, as I work with people, I see the light switch on. I see the realisations and the “ah hah” moments that bring about the potential for healing, self-determination and forgiveness.
The tragedy of family domestic violence is global and crosses all races and cultures, all class structures, all socio-economic groups, all genders.
It is a human condition for which there are answers, for which there is healing and growth beyond a grim and unsatisfactory present.
Sometimes there are easy enough answers with simple guidance. For some people, there is a fearful wall that can seem insurmountable – a seeming lost cause.
However, the intolerable can become tolerable, the pain can diminish, a light can shine, a way forward can become apparent, self belief can flourish, and personal growth can take you to a place of peace and vitality.
In the process of healing yourself, the angst and fury that surrounds you and your situation can be diminished and controlled, if not outright eliminated.
Your life path can be better as you begin to realise that life doesn’t have to be this way permanently. You do have the opportunity to get out, get unstuck … and move on.
SpeakOutLoud is a resource freely given by me for you to be well informed about how power and control is used to rule your world without your knowledge or consent. How people use coercive controlling behaviours and psychological abuse for their own selfish agendas. How social inequality, a lack of respect, caring, and lack of love is the root of the hidden, secretive world of domestic violence.