Do you wonder: “Is he doing this to me on purpose? And if he is knowingly being cruel, neglectful and controlling, then I find that too hard to take, that he would be so calculated in his nastiness to me. I’ve not done anything to create that.” Do you wish: “I’d rather he did not know what
SAFETY of Women & Children
How mothers can support daughters coping with an abusive relationship
– Posted in: Helping victims/survivors SAFETY of Women & Children Why does he do itJudy, whose heart was breaking witnessing her daughter living with an abusive man, made a comment about her daughter under my post Warning Signs that your Male Partner is Controlling you: “We hardly ever get to see her …. It’s all a lot of small things — calling her names, abusive to the max, being
Tactic #14 — Symbolic Aggression
– Posted in: Intimate partner abuse Male perpetrators SAFETY of Women & Children Why does he do itThis is the fourteenth of 16 blogs discussing the patterns of tactics from my power and control wheel — Symbolic Aggression. Drawing from research with men who have used symbolic aggression, and women who have been subjected to it, this blog illustrates just some of the tactics — these include the ways the perpetrator uses
How to Know if a Woman is in Danger of Being Killed and What You Can do About it
– Posted in: Helping victims/survivors Intimate partner abuse Male perpetrators SAFETY of Women & Children Why does he do it
Threats of suicide by a man with a history of psychologically controlling his partner can be an indicator that he could seriously harm or murder family members, often before killing himself. Such threats make it vital for wider family and friends to urge and support a woman to seek frontline help from skilled professionals. Conducting a
How to Stay Safe When You Leave a Controlling Partner
– Posted in: Children's exposure to abuse Helping victims/survivors SAFETY of Women & ChildrenWomen who have male partners who psychologically abuse, restrict, control, manipulate and rob women of their sense of self, need a safety plan whether their partner ever lays a finger on them or not. Many controlling men stalk, threaten and harass women who leave. Other controlling men use physical violence, or threaten to kill, or
Three things you need to understand to keep you and your children safe when you’re thinking of leaving
– Posted in: Helping victims/survivors Intimate partner abuse SAFETY of Women & ChildrenMen who murder their female partners are often motivated by a need to save face by regaining a sense of power and control if the woman threatens to leave, or does leave. Many mental health and legal professionals do not take women’s experience of psychological abuse and control seriously. But men’s perpetration of psychological abuse
Alcohol and murder
– Posted in: Alcohol & violence SAFETY of Women & ChildrenIn today's issue of the New Zealand Herald I read another example of a male perpetrator of domestic violence and psychological abuse who intended to harm his partner - but used alcohol as an excuse to minimise his responsibility. Snippets from the article say: "Ross Simon Fraser has admitted beating his partner Joanne Thompson to