Gender socialisation

Anthony, a man I interviewed for my PhD research, told me that alpha male “means very strong, independent person. Alphas always dictate to the beta males and the females. You will do it this way and this is how I want you to do it.” In 1765 William Blackstone, a theorist of the British common law [...]

Far seeing legislation puts the ambulance at the top of the cliff. In January 2015 the UK House of Commons amended the Serious Crime Bill [Lords] to make Coercive Controlling behaviour by an intimate partner or family member a criminal offence. The legislation came into force on 19th December 2015. Here is one man’s story about [...]

Dominant social pressures encourage many boys and men to wear a mask. To hide their authentic selves behind a wall. A barrier that prevents getting emotionally close to other men, and to women. Thrust into an unforgiving world of bullying, one-upmanship and power struggles amongst men — Many boys and men learn that to stay [...]

This is the fifteenth of 16 blogs discussing the patterns of tactics from my power and control wheel — Domestic Slavery. Rigid Gender Roles Amongst heterosexual couples, many people believe the man should be the breadwinner (although being the sole breadwinner is really only possible for wealthy families). Alongside this, many people believe the woman [...]

When we see that a man beats his wife we tend to assume the abuse is the problem of the individuals involved. He has a problem or she has a problem. The same is true if you read a newspaper article about a man who sexually abuses his female partner. Most readers assume the abuse [...]

Men and women are socialised into a society founded on social hierarchies. In the west, those who are considered to have higher status than others are white people, people with higher education, men, people in the middle age range (that is not children and not elderly), people who are physically and mentally able, the rich, [...]

Women continue to be bombarded with social messages that suggest they can find self-worth by marrying or committing to live long-term with a man But this does not mean they enter a relationship that leads to abuse and control. However, this was the case for many of the women I interviewed in my Masters research, [...]

Women I interviewed for my Masters research said that before marrying, most of them had total belief in their partner – because he was a man. The women said that trusting and believing their partner – just because he was a man – was socially encouraged. In other words when he used abusive language, or [...]

Do you wonder what it would feel like to be free? Do you have a legacy of fear and shame? Has the aftermath of abuse led you to be a conformist? Or has it led you to be riddled with anger so bad that you rebel? How to step out of the loop of coercive control [...]